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Chris Wright, Toe Poke writerOct 9, 2024, 04:00 AM ET
So much time and attention is spent examining the best and worst kits worn by soccer teams in Europe’s top leagues and around the world, but it is almost all focused on what the outfielders are wearing.
Therefore, it is only fair that the players who wears a totally different jersey to the rest of their teammates, the goalkeepers, are subjected to the same sartorial scrutiny for once.
After more than a century of wearing plain long-sleeved shirts in one colour (usually green), in the 1990s shot-stoppers were the players who would often be outfitted in the most outlandish apparel as kit designs became ever-more spectacular. Some of the jerseys worn by No. 1s in that decade were so bright and garish that, looking back, it’s hard to understand how they were ever allowed.
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Things have thankfully calmed down a fair bit since those heady days, but every so often we are still presented with some unforgettable uniforms as kit manufacturers seek to surprise and shock in equal measure.
We have cast an eye over the goalkeeper kits of clubs at all levels across Europe to find the good, the bad and the ugly designs being worn between the sticks this season. While some take their inspiration from sources as unlikely as cathedral architecture and the great British fish and chip shop, others simply defy explanation.
So, like any goalkeeper worth their salt, let’s dive right in!
The good
fcaugsburg.de
Along with a batch of player jerseys inspired by the Roman Empire, Augsburg have a lively array of goalkeeper kits that all feature the same neon diamond graphic. While the blue and yellow versions are both pretty loud, the black home shirt is absolutely awash with glorious technicolour.
bcfc.co.uk
While the weather may certainly have turned, the summery beach vibes are set to last all season at Aston Gate thanks to an absolutely joyful set of goalkeeper kits. The blue-toned home kit is undoubtedly the pick of the bunch. Hopefully the tessellating “rainbow” graphic will still look as buoyant and bouncy when those cold winter months start to drag.
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As worn by Lloyd Kazapua at the Africa Cup of Nations, Namibia’s jersey is a patchwork pattern with swatches of lilac, coral, orange and lime green — all presented in a series of wavy columns. The pattern is designed to emulate the style of the traditional textiles of the Ovambo people of southern Africa, and the result is a glorious riot of colour.
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Spanish club Betis have form in recent years when it comes to colourful goalkeeper kits, so it shouldn’t come as much of a shock to find that they have teamed up with Hummel to create a very wavy goalkeeper kit for 2024-25 complete with trippy ripples and a psychedelic rainbow gradient. As nice as it is, the jersey is not a bespoke design, with German club Werder Bremen also picking it off the rack this season.
Instagram @sheffieldunited
Not many clubs can claim to have a goalkeeper kit covered in a cool, star-spangled linear graphic that is a depiction of the ceiling architecture of the Lantern Tower at Sheffield Cathedral. In fact, we think the Blades might have something truly unique in that regard.
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Let’s face it; the maiden outfield offerings from Venezia’s new kit deal with Drake’s streetwear label Nocta have not been a patch on the glorious Kappa designs which preceded them. But at least goalkeeper Jesse Joronen can hold his own in the style stakes with this zesty green jersey.
The bad
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As bad as the away jersey worn by Manuel Neuer this season might be, it’s worth noting that Bayern are far from alone. Indeed, several clubs around Europe have been kitted out in the same Adidas Tiro template with the likes of Arsenal, Manchester United, Ajax, Juventus and Real Madrid all wearing different coloured variations of this mish-mash of a pattern.
The jagged, jumbled eyesore comes in a variety of colourways — yellow, grey, green, pink, red, etc — but few are quite as heinous as the purple/mauve/puce version that poor old Neuer has been saddled with.
However, Adidas did manage to claw some points back with the monochrome retro goalkeeper third kits they later released for Bayern, Arsenal and Manchester United — whose version of the stripped-back, trefoil-appointed template is probably the best of the batch.
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It would appear that Cologne also angled for a throwback design with a dark blue goalkeeper jersey which has then been overlaid with undulating ribbons of yellow, purple and magenta. Unfortunately, the German club have instead created a kit with all the style and panache of a Windows XP screensaver.
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Edinburgh club Hibs have drummed up a stinker in extremely bright pink with a jarring crackled graphic that makes it look crumpled and patchy from the get-go. Eye protection is most definitely advised.
Robbie Stephenson/PA Images via Getty Images
Another club mining the 90s nostalgia seam, all three of the Norwich goalkeeper kits for this season are intended as an homage to the cult classic jersey worn by legendary Canaries shot-stopper Bryan Gunn in the Premier League between 1994 and 96. Alas, the revamped editions just don’t have the same impact as the originals, even if they are being worn between the sticks by Angus Gunn, Bryan’s son.
The ugly
Daniela Porcelli/Eurasia Sport Images/Getty Images
All of Nike’s elite clientele are wearing their swirly “Gardien V” template this season with Atletico Madrid, Chelsea, Internazionale, Liverpool, Paris Saint-Germain and Tottenham Hotspur all sharing the same design in various colours.
On most of them, the shades of the two-tone design are only subtly different but Barça’s green version, with its contrasting radioactive bright and earthily dark squiggles, makes it look like the contents of a handkerchief after a particularly nasty head cold.
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In much the same vein as Adidas and Nike, Puma has also seen fit fit to dish out template kits to all of the top clubs it sponsors this season, simply cycling through a small palette of colourways.
While Borussia Dortmund ended up in beige and AC Milan in yellow, City were unfortunately lumped with the ugliest of all the available colour combos. Ederson has been forced to turn out in a hideous concoction of gravy brown, grimy green and garish pink.
Then just to cap things off, the Brazilian’s matchday ensemble was completed with an equally horrific neon pink warm-up top. Wall-to-wall gruesomeness.
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It’s rare that graffiti looks good on a football shirt and the Jags have proven that point with their 2024-25 goalkeeper kit. The pale blue jersey is plastered with a cacophony of barely legible scribbles including references to Maryhill (the area of the Scottish town in which the club play), the degrees of longitude and latitude of their stadium and the name of John Lambie, who managed the club over four separate stints between 1988 and 2005. Just a mess, really.
Llantwit Major AFC (Tor Sports)
Instagram @llantwit.majorafc
You may love it; you may hate it, but few could argue that Welsh club Llantwit Major are not runaway winners when it comes to the weirdest goalkeeper kit in world football this season.
Their novelty jersey is very obviously inspired by the best that British cuisine has to offer: fish and chips (“Pysgod” is the Welsh word for fish).
In fact, it’s not just the shirt; the shorts are also completely covered in the same chips pattern as the bottom of the jersey. The ensemble is completed with a pair of bright hooped socks in clashing colours.
A far as we can glean, there is absolutely no reason why Llantwit Major have gone for this kit, other than the team being based in a coastal town with several decent chippies. Perhaps, that is reason enough.
